Cara’s Blog

I was cleaning out my Outlook Box and came across a lovely posting about my site I hadn’t seen before. It’s been a long time now since I did anything with ’shyguys’ and so it came as a pleasant surprise that guys were still finding the site and enjoying it. People are still reading my Ezine articles too, which is great. Always pleased to hear I’ve helped my favourite type of male move a little closer to getting the woman of his dreams.

So, knowing thereare  still guys out there who are reading my postings I thought I’d write another. This one comes from the heart, as I am living this myself in a big way!

It’s very easy to get down-hearted about Life. The more sensitive you are, the easier it is. Sometimes you look around at the world and everyone else but you seems to be successful and happy. Othertimes, you look around and you’re overwelmed by what a mess people’s lives seem to be. Both, strangely enough, make you feel more despondant.

What’s the answer? Putting into practise what you have learned, every day. Not just when you feel like it. Every day!

Take one of my ideas from the secrets that are up on the site, (I can’t find the rest. They’ve disappeared into the void that is my computer’s filing system), or in my Ezine articles, and put it into practise. Keep a log of what you do and the results. Sort of like a science experiment.

For instance, go join a class or group that you know women will attend. Write it down as your activity for that day. Go out and people watch for an hour and record what behaviours seem to work for men. That’s another day’s activity. Or more than one day, if you seem to be picking up some good tips.

Join an on-line dating site and send out complimentary emails to women who attract your attention. I get some really nice emails from guys on the site I’m on. I also gets some terrible ones too. Hint: Its not enough to just say hello, or send out a blanket email and hope someone replies.  You have to make an effort with each and every email.

Look at the lady and see what appeals to you about her. Then email her and just tell her what attracted you. (No, I don’t mean -you’ve got great tits! Be nice!) She may answer or she may not, but if you’ve paid someone a compliment that day, log it in your book.

You never know when Miss Right might get your compliment and reply. And you never know what down-hearted lady will be picked up a little by your comment (like I am with the comments on this Blog when I get them).

Making someone feel good makes you feel good!

Keep at it! Do something every day to move your Life toward the goals you have set. No exceptions. If something isn’t working, try something else. Ask for advice from your girl-friends. Keep at it!

This is what I have to do everyday to move my life forward. This is what everyone has to do to move their life forward! Even the megarich and famous people.

So, what have you done today to make your life(or someone else’s) better? You’ll be amazed how much more otpimistic you’ll feel if you just DO something positive!

As you may have gathered from my products and my writing, I’m rather BIG on anything to do with self-development. It’s what has got me where I am today, and it is what will move me forward in my life tomorrow.

The big difference between me and a lot of the other people who are helping guys get dates is that I use a little help from Presence. It’s crazy to try to do anything in your life the hard way. It is so much easier to do it by tapping into your very own Inner Turbo-Charged energy source.

Once you learn Presence you can take any of the other strategies and processes out there and make them work! Until you tap into Presence your chances of success, especially as a shy guy, are greatly reduced. Why?

Because of your primitive brains programing. It’s entrenched and tricky. Trying to untangle the programming and correct the glitches is a painstaking and tedious process. It’s a bit like a newbie trying to find a virus on a computer. But with Presence it’s like hiring the best computer mind in the country and letting them loose to track the virus and destroy it.

And finding Presence is a heck of a lot easier than finding a top gun computer expert who doesn’t charge the earth

All my products are designed to help you access Presence and then use it to get what you want in life. For most of you it’s the woman of your dreams.

I’ve also found this great website that describes itself as ” the most complete guide to information about Self -Improvement, Personal Growth and Self Help on the Internet. It is designed to be an organized directory, with articles and references to thousands of other Web Sites on the World Wide Web.”

If you want to know more about what I’m talking about you’ll find it on this site Self Improvement from SelfGrowth.com 

My stuff is tailored to one aspect of your life. But you have so many other parts of yourself and your life. Why not explore Self-Growth once you’ve got your feet wet using my stuff.

See me and my products as your starting point to a whole new you! And follow the yellow brick road that SelfGrowth offers!

x Cara

This is just a celebratory post. I have had my first email from a reader, my first purchase of an audio, and my first sign-up for the rest of my secrets. All from different people! Which means that people are seeing my site. And they are taking action, which is what all the experts tell me is very important.

For me it’s like an amazing break-through. I’ve always done well in my coaching, teaching and training work. But that was all face to face. This is the first time I’ve had to set up a ’shop front’, as it were, and attract people who didn’t know me, to give me a go.

That I seem to be getting somewhere is very heartening. I’ve spent so long getting this site ready to go live. And now I’m getting the results. I’m getting shy guys to pay attention to what I have to say,  hopefully follow through, so they get the girls who are out there waiting for them. Because of me! Or maybe I should say, because of my help. Really, if you shy guys get the girl, it will be because of YOU, not me. But I’ll still get a buzz out of knowing I’ve been useful to you.

So, here’s to you, my first shy guys!Thank you! And to the rest of you who will follow by finding my site and liking what you find! Thank you too!

I’ve finally got this Blog looking the way I want it to. All I have to do now is write and get people to read.

I’ve been so caught up in the creativity of what I’m doing that the hard part- the getting ‘traffic’ as they call it- to my site has been on the back burner. Hey, you don’t want people seeing your stuff until it’s ready, do you?

Well, now it’s ready, and up, and except for little issues like getting the payment process working, there is not a lot of the nitty gritties to concern me. So now I have to focus on getting shy guys to my site. If you’re reading this, I guess I’ve succeeded.

And although I do want to make enough money to keep a roof over my head- and more importantly, live my dream of helping nice people get what they want in their lives, from the comfort of my own living room- as long as one shy guy is reading this and gets some use out of what I have to offer, it will have been worth all the effort. (That was a very long sentence! Tut tut)

And it has been an effort. This project has been my only occupaton for months now. I created it all myself- and a few friends who have checked it out think it looks professional- not bad for a complete web-design newbie!

But my dream has kept me going. And I hope it continues to keep me going on the next leg of the journey.

Is your dream keeping you going? Or has life knocked you about so much that you’ve lost sight of it?

You don’t have to be a shy guy to have that happen. It happens to us all. The difference between the happy person and the unhappy person seems to be their ability to get their dream back- or replace it with a better one.

It’s not about achieving the dream. That’s kind of an anti-climax. It’s about the fun of the chase. Once you have your dream come true you get a moment of satisfaction- or joy or happiness- and then you feel kind of empty. You’re empty because what you’ve held out in front of you for so long is suddenly not there anymore. And even if it’s the best thing in the world, and you are over-joyed to have it, you’ve actually lost your motivation. You’ve lost what drove you forward. And that leaves you empty.

This is normal. Some people give up their dreams because they’ve experienced this emptiness and they’ve decided that meant dreams weren’t worth the effort.

But they’re missing the point! It’s not ABOUT getting the dream, it’s ABOUT the expectation of getting it.

There is nothing wrong with getting your dream. Hey, if there was, I wouldn’t be so happy about getting this site up! It’s about valuing what you achieved and then looking around for the next dream to chase.

Now, I see this happen in relationships. People are so keen to get their dream partner. When they do, they’re happy for a while. And then they start missing the dream-chasing, so they start looking around for another person to fall in love with. Or they break up with their partner so they can have a clear conscience to go chase another dream-lover.

It doesn’t work. People just become serial monogamists. It’s not the dream girl that is the problem! You just need to find another dream to focus on and keep the dream you’ve already achieved, safely in your life.

Find another passion- something not related to romance- to chase! But don’t forget to value what you have gained… don’t take that lovely lady for granted, now that she’s yours, and you’re off on another quest.

Somewhere in the background their needs to be an on-going dream about quality time with loved ones, nurturing and supporting each other through the tough times. And allowing yourself the pleasure of the good times. That dream needs to be powerful and on-going, while you’re chasing the next dream of a house in the country, or better job, or…whatever.

If you make a dream come true, and then you lose it from neglect- that is a very sad thing.

So, here I am, keeping my dream alive so it can motivate me to move forward in my life. Somewhere in the background is a much more powerful dream- to find my dream-lover- again. But it’s not my major focus at the moment. This is my dream at the moment and I’m throwing everything I have into it.

What dream are you chasing right now? How do you keep it alive? Are you doing the hard work required to GET what you want or are you expecting it to land in your lap with no effort at all! Questions worth considering.

This is my first Blog. It’s difficult to sit down and write about your personal life, just for the interest of others. What do I tell you that you’ll find interesting? Are the events of my life, my thoughts and feelings, going to hold your attention? 

I guess in a way they’re the sort of questions we all ask ourselves when we get talking with someone. Will this person find me interesting? Interesting enough to want to hang around for a while? Interesting enough to like me. 

And the only way to know that is to start talking and see what happens. 

I tend to think that when someone talks about their passions, no matter what they are, people will be interested. There is something in the energy that you put behind your words, when you’re talking about something you love. 

I remember reading this article that said something like that. And it said that on a date it was more interesting to listen to someone who is passionate about stamp collecting rather than someone bored with shark hunting! 

As I’ve never talked to people who had either of these interests, I wouldn’t know. But I do know it is so much better listening to someone engaged with their subject, not just saying what they feel obliged to say. ‘Have a nice day?’ said by the bored shop assistant, for example. 

So, after all that, I’ve decided to talk about what I’m passionate about. And that’s passion! Huh, got ya! 

Most people think that passion is reserved for the sexual arena. But that’s not true. It just happens to be the place where we can observe passion at its highest pitch. Can’t help but notice a passionate embrace, or kiss, or whatever… 

And I’m all for passion in sex. Don’t get me wrong. I love passion in sex! It just doesn’t have the same zing if either party isn’t into it completely. I know guys sometimes have to try to control their passion to last longer, but sometimes fast and furious definitely has its advantages. Sometimes a woman likes to feel she can get a guy to loose control and it just doesn’t matter if he comes before her. It’s just an amazing buzz when both parties are swept away. 

But I wasn’t going to talk about sex. I don’t want my Blog to be seen as a sleazy voyeur experience. I don’t want men to be reading my Blog just trawling for the sex. But because sex is a big part of life, then it will come up at times. 

So, back to passion. I like to live my life passionately. Sometimes that means deep lows, broken hearts, and devastating betrayal. Other times it means the sublime heights of beauty and joy and love. By living passionately, I get the most out of every moment, and sometimes I feel as if I’ve lived ten lifetimes rather than just one. 

I like to never have a serious regret. To say ‘I wish I’d done this or that…’ If I want to try something, I do, unless it’s seriously dangerous or goes against my values. I used to want to sky dive when I was a kid. I have no regrets that I never did it. It just holds no interest anymore. 

I do regret hurting people, no matter how unintentional. And I try never to hurt people if I can help it. But life, by its very nature means that sometimes we are hurt and sometimes we hurt others. The best any of us can do is to do our best NOT to hurt others, and forgive ourselves when we do. 

I get passionate about my work. Whatever project I’m involved with at the time. At the moment, it’s this website! I get up every day and look forward to sitting down at the keyboard to write articles or web pages. It was a serious buzz writing my Secrets! I could have written so many more than 11. I’ll probably write them here as I go along. 

Being passionate about what you do makes the time fly. It makes you happy to be doing what you’re doing. More than happy! Ecstatic! And while-ever something makes me feel that way to be doing it, I do it. 

What are you passionate about?